Some readers have their own opinions about the workplace advice that this columnist doled out over the past six months.Please direct any inquiries regarding office, financial, career, or work-life balance matters to workfriend@nytimes.com. Please include your name and location, or specify if you wish to remain anonymous. Letters may be edited for clarity and length.
As the Work Friend columnist for The New York Times, I have received numerous responses from readers over the past six months. These responses have been insightful, critical, thought-provoking, and at times, even slightly insulting. However, they have all made me reflect on my answers to the questions I have chosen to address in this column.
For my final column of 2024, I wanted to do something different and share some of the feedback I have received from readers, both positive and negative, about not just my responses, but also the questions themselves.
One of the most popular columns was my first one, published on July 7th, titled “Dropping In Just to Say Hi!” In this column, a reader expressed discomfort with a colleague’s habit of initiating conversations on Slack with just a “hello” and no follow-up. In my response, I empathized with the reader’s frustrations and even referred to the practice as “creepy.” Many readers had something to say about this, and their comments were insightful.
One reader wrote, “I found it comical that neither the advice seeker nor you thought to simply prompt the ‘hi’-writing colleague to elaborate on the purpose of his greeting, rather than just letting it ‘languish’ with no response. What happened to common civility? If someone says hi, you say hi back! Or you can say, ‘Yes, how can I help you?’ Or ‘Did you have a question?’ Perhaps it’s his way of checking to see if you are busy. And if no response, he assumes you’re not available to chat. Or perhaps HE feels put out that everyone else ignores his attempts to connect! He doesn’t want to be annoying and keep pestering people who don’t reply. So he doesn’t follow up. Has anyone tried to just ask? There is no need to be snide.”
Another reader shared, “Just wanted to note that when you send a message to someone via Teams or Slack, it is proper to say ‘hi’ and wait for a response before putting your full request or comment in the message. This is to ensure the receiver is ready to receive the message, which may be confidential. If they are sitting with a colleague or in a meeting, they may not want to be interrupted or have another colleague see the contents of the message. If there is no reply to ‘hi,’ the sender can assume the receiver is busy or not available to receive the message. Just thought I’d pass that along.”
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